It’s pathetic how I idly waste my time in listening to two of the most suitable songs that match my mood. From morning to night, those two song just play and re-play themselves on my I-pod, on my cell phone and even inside my head. How pathetic can the rest of my life be?
As foreseen, I’m still in a wreck… and to think it’s almost school time. Really~ I actually wonder how I’ll manage to get through the first day without failing everyone’s expectations… especially mine, since I plan on hiding a few facts about myself. I just HATE responsibility. I’ll take anyone on when it comes to leadership (weird enough but I can get a group project done smoothly) but when it comes to putting a big burden, then I’ll have to pass. If the need arises, I’ll lie that I can’t even hold my pen or something that’ll make me look like a useless person. It’s the only thing that’ll prevent the situation that everyone’ll blame me.
I hate that feeling too. The feeling when you’ve done your best but people never recognize your efforts. In fact, they sneer at your hard work and declare that it’s not enough. It’s as if THEY can do a much better work at it. Hmph. I hate people like those. I can actually name a few people who I’ve come across: those who think they’re gods or some sort of lord. Through my 2 years of high school, I’ve kept close watch and backed down in any chance given to work with them. It’s intuition, really. They have their good points, don’t get me wrong, but being pulled down by their insensitivity and sheer narrow-mindedness can get on anyone’s nerves.
I haven’t been inside a classroom where people are all chums. Bea, pam and chie have, and it’s good for them. For me, not yet. The time hasn’t come for me to realize that they’re good. All I know is that the classroom’s a cycle of backstabbing and hidden hatred. Friends are friends, sure, but you can call anyone your friend. No one uses the word ‘acquaintance’, to be safe.
I don’t really know why I feel pessimistic. Maybe because when I looked over the names of my to-be classmates, I felt somewhat… different. Not even one close friend to boot. Not even one of them with an amazing attraction to anime, literature or whatnot. When I looked at the list for the first time, I felt like a real black sheep; the out of place person. Angel’s there but she’s changed. I really don’t know how to react to it. Hayoon’s there too but she’s got her circle. Cla is just too smart and Mia goes with her. Those are the only people I know and I already feel like I wanna give up.
Maybe I’ll spend my whole year with the other room people, but that’s wishful thinking. What happens inside the classroom then? What will happen when it’s time for groups? For committees? I feel so desolated about it all, I can hardly say I’m excited for classes to begin. All I’m looking forward is the END of the school year, which in reality is a year away.
Why is my life so… so… complicated? Why can’t I just understand? I want to do good, get grades that my parents are going to be so proud of, but I can’t live like that, right? I can’t just turn blind to the life I know and embrace with all my might! Thinking about it, I kinda wish there was some sort of chance I can change rooms. I actually want to go to room 8 or 10 or wherever shaniqua and kitty is. All I want is to feel I belong cause right now, I actually know that I don’t.
As far as school work goes, I’ll manage. I just don’t want to feel shitty and left out. I don’t want to feel rejected by the way I am. I know a lot of people reject me (there’s no use in denying it) and even hate and resent me. I can live with the façade they’re going to play against me but I just can’t take it if all of whom I’m surrounded with are all like that. And I’m not resorting to clinging to my adviser either, whoever she is. I may be nice, but I’m not a teacher’s pet. I have a life too and it doesn’t include being liked by teachers. I bet they see me as a nuisance. An awful one at that.
Worse, I won’t have Brian. I won’t have him to talk to me, to ease a few complications… I can’t say it exactly but I’ll miss him terribly. I already do now, and it hurts that I can’t show it. I have to look normal. Of course it’s my problem and it’s all up to me to fix it. It’s not my dad’s fault, neither is it my mom’s. They want me to finish and live properly. I’ll do what they want, fine, but I’ll have to do what I find right too. It’s sad I can’t say even a proper goodbye… I try saying it to tammy, but the words just won’t come out. I end up staring at him and thinking ‘he’s sticking his tongue at me because I’m pathetic’.
Pathetic. My life’s one big miserable joke.
I’ll hate myself even more if I don’t get anywhere.
…
as a side note, here’s a part of a song I’ve totally forgotten except the chorus…
‘cause I still believe in destiny
that you and I were meant to be
I still wish on a star as it falls from above
Cause I still believe
Believe in love’
I quite doubt that these are the right lyrics, since my mind’s a bit rusty, but I can sing it :D now to find where I got them…
-shing
(to think it’s such a nice day today and I’ve been rambling on badly… how could I?)
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Monday, June 2, 2008
I’m a famous nobody
So far, I’m still caught up with the emotions I felt during the m3 con last Saturday; happiness, disappointment, hyper and maybe a bit of hopeful wishing. For the whole day, it was a roller coaster ride of conflicting emotions and shoving them in the past. I’m sorry to those who were forced to say I looked pretty. Thanks for the effort of trying to cheer me up guys! I love you all~
Since I’ve written it mostly all in my uh… ‘not so secret’ ugly notebook, I won’t waste space. All I know is that I felt oh so gloriously happy. Not even the stares of a million people could ruin it. No, I regret wearing shorts and my new top. According to iks, he noticed others stealing glances at my front. Yes, ridiculous as it sounds, I even checked in the mirror to be sure. I guess the cut of the blouse really meant it to be that way. Oh well, it’s done anyway.
Another thing I feel stupid for is crying on the con itself in the midst of a lot of people. I kinda thank chie for keeping me in check. Oh, and for pulling me back when I was about to make another attempt. How do you say this… I was a bit desperate. Crying in the taxi helped too, cause manong driver was trying to cheer me up too. At the end of the ride (taft station) I was teased to death… and I felt happy about it.
Chie, bea, pam, dani, tina, iya, rissa, my lovable chaperone (yes, I had one) and kuya… thanks for making that day so fun! What a way to ‘mourn’ the end of summer ><
…
I know it’s late, but I just got to watch 300… it was cool >< and all along I thought it was some pointless gory movie… I was so wrong about that~
…
so I guess the other entries posted are those old ones. Forgive me, but I haven’t been online even once ever since 3 weeks ago. Self control? Pretty much~
-shing
Since I’ve written it mostly all in my uh… ‘not so secret’ ugly notebook, I won’t waste space. All I know is that I felt oh so gloriously happy. Not even the stares of a million people could ruin it. No, I regret wearing shorts and my new top. According to iks, he noticed others stealing glances at my front. Yes, ridiculous as it sounds, I even checked in the mirror to be sure. I guess the cut of the blouse really meant it to be that way. Oh well, it’s done anyway.
Another thing I feel stupid for is crying on the con itself in the midst of a lot of people. I kinda thank chie for keeping me in check. Oh, and for pulling me back when I was about to make another attempt. How do you say this… I was a bit desperate. Crying in the taxi helped too, cause manong driver was trying to cheer me up too. At the end of the ride (taft station) I was teased to death… and I felt happy about it.
Chie, bea, pam, dani, tina, iya, rissa, my lovable chaperone (yes, I had one) and kuya… thanks for making that day so fun! What a way to ‘mourn’ the end of summer ><
…
I know it’s late, but I just got to watch 300… it was cool >< and all along I thought it was some pointless gory movie… I was so wrong about that~
…
so I guess the other entries posted are those old ones. Forgive me, but I haven’t been online even once ever since 3 weeks ago. Self control? Pretty much~
-shing
Life : it’s complicated
No, right now, I just don’t really get myself at all… it’s as if for the past 30 minutes I felt like I was in a trance.
Yes, again with being bored. I’ve never felt so much boredom in my whole entire life! I was scourging the 2nd floor for missed books when suddenly I felt the urge to just look at the contents of every drawer, every cabinet and every shelf. Yup, even re-checking my school books for the 100th time.
I guess I was wondering where the past was. I was hoping that some piece of paper from my past would turn up. You know, the ones with my ugly handwriting and all that. Of course, I couldn’t help but get disappointed when none actually appeared. I must’ve threw it all out.
I never had a diary when I was young, honestly. I couldn’t care much to what happened the afternoon before or whatever. I just started writing when I read Anne Frank’s diary. Yes, call me a copy cat but I did. That was when I was 10. so what ever happened to the memories I had when I was 1-9?
I know, I’m rambling; it’s another product of boredom. I’ve pushed my brother out and even used the dim lights this time, just for the feel. To me, I find it hard to find time for myself. It’s always me and my brother… or me and my parents… maybe the only times I DO get time for myself is when I watch TV. Exclude the fact that I have 2 others with me whenever I do.
…
I’m supposed to shut up about this but I just can’t help it. I felt disappointed when chie told me kate couldn’t come on Saturday. No, I’m not going to say bad things about those who disallowed her for not letting her go (cause it’s not me… and that would be rude and impolite cause they’ve been so nice to me ever since… except JP… JP’s mean cause he teases me a lot and makes rude statements that seem inappropriate at some point) but I just don’t understand why she’s not allowed. Her dad didn’t give a reason (I think) and I guess this was another episode of ‘i’ll tell you you’re not allowed at the last minute’. Yes, this has happened often enough. Of course, we’re getting sick of it, but what can we do?
Though life is complicated I can honestly say I like my life better than my best friend’s. She knows this fact, no need to worry. I’ve pointed this out to her millions of times already :D
…
Isn’t it obvious that I’m going through the stage of life called ‘with writer’s block’?
…
When I’m with you by Simple Plan – listening to this once again
…
FF tactics. Currently, I’m stuck on beating the dragon totema dude and I’m getting irritated that he keeps on winning… like, what the… I’m getting myself a walkthrough if I get sick of trying to beat him and his 3 enormous (not to mention powerful) guards.
Not just that, it’s annoying that the story turns out to be Mewt’s fantasy. I was like ‘O___O of all the people why him?!?’ I was expecting it was Marche’s brother, but nooooooo… Ritz seems like she’s enjoying Ivalice though… I bet Marche’s brother would turn out to be some big shot mage or something. I’m betting on it.
…
one day left till the con!!! Yeah!!!
…
Okay, confession : I think the currently running coke commercial is the BEST commercial the Coca Cola company has ever thought of. I know, I know… it’s quite strange but I’m actually drawn to the commercial. Maybe because it had a celestial being in it (which isn’t really common in commercials) or because it had an attractive girl and cute guy to act in it… wouldn’t know. I just thought the idea was fantastic. I just don’t get why the angel wanted to figure out who’s ‘aaaaahhh’ she heard belonged to. Then she drinks coke and meets a demon-turned-human hot looking dude. Ehehe. Can actually form a story based from that… hmm… :3
…
okay! Obviously I’m ranting to waste time. It’s just 9 and I’m not the least bit sleepy. Sleep doesn’t want to come to me now. I just know it. The sandman leaves me behind after he’s sprinkled dust on everyone else’s eyes in my house. How could he forget me? I’m obviously begging him to make me sleep a little earlier…. Even just 11. School’s about to start and I just can’t imagine myself going with eye bags!!! Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu… never! Never! Not in a million years will I turn up like that!!!
…
staring at my books… nothing else to do but fix them… again…
-shing
Yes, again with being bored. I’ve never felt so much boredom in my whole entire life! I was scourging the 2nd floor for missed books when suddenly I felt the urge to just look at the contents of every drawer, every cabinet and every shelf. Yup, even re-checking my school books for the 100th time.
I guess I was wondering where the past was. I was hoping that some piece of paper from my past would turn up. You know, the ones with my ugly handwriting and all that. Of course, I couldn’t help but get disappointed when none actually appeared. I must’ve threw it all out.
I never had a diary when I was young, honestly. I couldn’t care much to what happened the afternoon before or whatever. I just started writing when I read Anne Frank’s diary. Yes, call me a copy cat but I did. That was when I was 10. so what ever happened to the memories I had when I was 1-9?
I know, I’m rambling; it’s another product of boredom. I’ve pushed my brother out and even used the dim lights this time, just for the feel. To me, I find it hard to find time for myself. It’s always me and my brother… or me and my parents… maybe the only times I DO get time for myself is when I watch TV. Exclude the fact that I have 2 others with me whenever I do.
…
I’m supposed to shut up about this but I just can’t help it. I felt disappointed when chie told me kate couldn’t come on Saturday. No, I’m not going to say bad things about those who disallowed her for not letting her go (cause it’s not me… and that would be rude and impolite cause they’ve been so nice to me ever since… except JP… JP’s mean cause he teases me a lot and makes rude statements that seem inappropriate at some point) but I just don’t understand why she’s not allowed. Her dad didn’t give a reason (I think) and I guess this was another episode of ‘i’ll tell you you’re not allowed at the last minute’. Yes, this has happened often enough. Of course, we’re getting sick of it, but what can we do?
Though life is complicated I can honestly say I like my life better than my best friend’s. She knows this fact, no need to worry. I’ve pointed this out to her millions of times already :D
…
Isn’t it obvious that I’m going through the stage of life called ‘with writer’s block’?
…
When I’m with you by Simple Plan – listening to this once again
…
FF tactics. Currently, I’m stuck on beating the dragon totema dude and I’m getting irritated that he keeps on winning… like, what the… I’m getting myself a walkthrough if I get sick of trying to beat him and his 3 enormous (not to mention powerful) guards.
Not just that, it’s annoying that the story turns out to be Mewt’s fantasy. I was like ‘O___O of all the people why him?!?’ I was expecting it was Marche’s brother, but nooooooo… Ritz seems like she’s enjoying Ivalice though… I bet Marche’s brother would turn out to be some big shot mage or something. I’m betting on it.
…
one day left till the con!!! Yeah!!!
…
Okay, confession : I think the currently running coke commercial is the BEST commercial the Coca Cola company has ever thought of. I know, I know… it’s quite strange but I’m actually drawn to the commercial. Maybe because it had a celestial being in it (which isn’t really common in commercials) or because it had an attractive girl and cute guy to act in it… wouldn’t know. I just thought the idea was fantastic. I just don’t get why the angel wanted to figure out who’s ‘aaaaahhh’ she heard belonged to. Then she drinks coke and meets a demon-turned-human hot looking dude. Ehehe. Can actually form a story based from that… hmm… :3
…
okay! Obviously I’m ranting to waste time. It’s just 9 and I’m not the least bit sleepy. Sleep doesn’t want to come to me now. I just know it. The sandman leaves me behind after he’s sprinkled dust on everyone else’s eyes in my house. How could he forget me? I’m obviously begging him to make me sleep a little earlier…. Even just 11. School’s about to start and I just can’t imagine myself going with eye bags!!! Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu… never! Never! Not in a million years will I turn up like that!!!
…
staring at my books… nothing else to do but fix them… again…
-shing
Explaining myself… again
There are times when I just don’t feel like going out at all and there are times I want the exact opposite. For a few weeks now, I haven’t really stepped out of my house for God knows what reason and I haven’t updated almost anything. Sure, I go to mass every Sunday (thus going out) and I guess I did explore Trinoma last Sunday too, but that’s just it. Monday till Saturday I’m stuck bored shitless inside the house.
I once called chie during the night and told her my life was so boring. At the same time my brother was trying to poke me. Okay, so my butt’s all that sensitive and I actually feel ticklish there at some point so I was like running with the cordless around the room. Chie was like ‘so that’s the boring life huh?’ ‘yeah’ ‘wish I could live it…’ ‘be my guest chie! Live the boring life… like me!’
Well, maybe there’s a real reason why I don’t want to go out anymore. Ever heard of being stalked? Kate didn’t seem to agree with me when I related to her what happened but I kinda swear it wasn’t just the feeling of being watched. More like being taken pictures of or recorded on cam. Yeah, I’m paranoid, so what? Ever since the December thing (and now the fucked up car that parked right in front of my ma’s place) I’ve been paranoid. What do they want anyway? At the age of 16, it’s quite believable that I haven’t made enemies with powerful people and I’m not really doing anything bad. No, I don’t do drugs nor do I drink on a daily basis. And the hell with the option that those guys want me on some trade. I wear big clothes going out. There’s no way in hell they’ll get me.
Okay, forget it. When school time comes, I’ll have enough time to forget everything. Include that I’m basically a workaholic on my profile.
I remember a friend of mine saying that whenever we bumped into each other, I was always rushing. Yeah, I do agree. I’m always rushing. Rushing towards the classroom, the time limit, the end of the day. It has always been like that, I guess. Honestly, I want to rush school too. I want to finish already and I just want to live a life with a nice job, a nice house and a dog like Misty. The aim’s too big, I know, and most probably I’ll end up trying to make ends meet and die without even paying debts. Of course, I’ll try to change that future. I’m the only one who’s game enough to take it all on. My parents are actually convinced that I’ll get somewhere…
Somehow, it’s hard convincing myself that I will.
…
Yipee! The 31st is actually near! Woot! I can’t help but laugh and jump for joy. It’s like getting what I want after everything I’ve been through. It’s like getting chocolates for valentines when you’ve been totally hopeless about getting even one. Yes, I’m going to go splurging. Yes, I’ll enjoy myself (despite having a chaperone… my yaya’s nice, eventually). Yes, I’m going to go fan crazy and take lots of photos. Yes, I’ll try finishing house of the dead 4 (finally!). No, I won’t pay off the lost bet I have with chie and kate. Chie will most definitely get a burger though… if I remember :)
…
FF tactics. Call me crazy and old fashioned but tactics is just a gameboy advance game I’ve been crying for since yesterday night. My mom confiscated it cause I’ve been playing it since morning. No, it’s not hard to play but as the title implies, if you haven’t got good tactics, you’ll just basically fail every mission given. Yeah, I’ve lost several times but it’s amusing how I’ve learned how to play a battle, with the winning cards on my hand. The last time I played, Marche finally found Ritz and got disappointed since Ritz didn’t want to change the world she now lived in (ivalice). It must be cool to be able to defeat all kinds of monsters and other clans by the use of magic and swords.
I just felt stupid for not knowing how to pause the game.
…
What I’m about to say is a confession: I feel inferior to those who wear make up. Yeah, even my mother.
…
I haven’t thought about yaoi for a long time now, but I guess I miss it now when boredom struck me at the head. Yes, I miss yaoi. Or maybe I haven’t really lived my life ever since the school year ended two months ago. Yeah, I think so. I haven’t even watched one proper show over the summer. Just the same old boring stuff shown on tv… minus the cable.
-shing
I once called chie during the night and told her my life was so boring. At the same time my brother was trying to poke me. Okay, so my butt’s all that sensitive and I actually feel ticklish there at some point so I was like running with the cordless around the room. Chie was like ‘so that’s the boring life huh?’ ‘yeah’ ‘wish I could live it…’ ‘be my guest chie! Live the boring life… like me!’
Well, maybe there’s a real reason why I don’t want to go out anymore. Ever heard of being stalked? Kate didn’t seem to agree with me when I related to her what happened but I kinda swear it wasn’t just the feeling of being watched. More like being taken pictures of or recorded on cam. Yeah, I’m paranoid, so what? Ever since the December thing (and now the fucked up car that parked right in front of my ma’s place) I’ve been paranoid. What do they want anyway? At the age of 16, it’s quite believable that I haven’t made enemies with powerful people and I’m not really doing anything bad. No, I don’t do drugs nor do I drink on a daily basis. And the hell with the option that those guys want me on some trade. I wear big clothes going out. There’s no way in hell they’ll get me.
Okay, forget it. When school time comes, I’ll have enough time to forget everything. Include that I’m basically a workaholic on my profile.
I remember a friend of mine saying that whenever we bumped into each other, I was always rushing. Yeah, I do agree. I’m always rushing. Rushing towards the classroom, the time limit, the end of the day. It has always been like that, I guess. Honestly, I want to rush school too. I want to finish already and I just want to live a life with a nice job, a nice house and a dog like Misty. The aim’s too big, I know, and most probably I’ll end up trying to make ends meet and die without even paying debts. Of course, I’ll try to change that future. I’m the only one who’s game enough to take it all on. My parents are actually convinced that I’ll get somewhere…
Somehow, it’s hard convincing myself that I will.
…
Yipee! The 31st is actually near! Woot! I can’t help but laugh and jump for joy. It’s like getting what I want after everything I’ve been through. It’s like getting chocolates for valentines when you’ve been totally hopeless about getting even one. Yes, I’m going to go splurging. Yes, I’ll enjoy myself (despite having a chaperone… my yaya’s nice, eventually). Yes, I’m going to go fan crazy and take lots of photos. Yes, I’ll try finishing house of the dead 4 (finally!). No, I won’t pay off the lost bet I have with chie and kate. Chie will most definitely get a burger though… if I remember :)
…
FF tactics. Call me crazy and old fashioned but tactics is just a gameboy advance game I’ve been crying for since yesterday night. My mom confiscated it cause I’ve been playing it since morning. No, it’s not hard to play but as the title implies, if you haven’t got good tactics, you’ll just basically fail every mission given. Yeah, I’ve lost several times but it’s amusing how I’ve learned how to play a battle, with the winning cards on my hand. The last time I played, Marche finally found Ritz and got disappointed since Ritz didn’t want to change the world she now lived in (ivalice). It must be cool to be able to defeat all kinds of monsters and other clans by the use of magic and swords.
I just felt stupid for not knowing how to pause the game.
…
What I’m about to say is a confession: I feel inferior to those who wear make up. Yeah, even my mother.
…
I haven’t thought about yaoi for a long time now, but I guess I miss it now when boredom struck me at the head. Yes, I miss yaoi. Or maybe I haven’t really lived my life ever since the school year ended two months ago. Yeah, I think so. I haven’t even watched one proper show over the summer. Just the same old boring stuff shown on tv… minus the cable.
-shing
Picking up where I left off
Days seem colder and the hours just pass me by right now. Well, that’s what I think. It’s like I’m living a movie: everyday, I just repeat the same things every hour, every time. All without fail. Scratch the talk about changing myself: it’s not happening anytime soon. Well, at least I’m trying to start things again.
For example, writing forsaken. A few more days till school starts and I finally found my old manuscripts. Yes, people, I stopped re-writing it cause I LOST the only copy I had. Gomen, kate. I know I didn’t tell you that but I found it now :D I’ll be up and working in a while… and editing it bit by bit too. Can I say once more that my writing sucks? Ahahahaha. I even wonder why I’m writing for a name… I’ve been reading past works again (all unfinished and finished ones) and I try not to laugh at them because I wrote them… the irony they make me feel is unexplainable. *sigh*
Markus Zusak, author of ‘the book thief’ and ‘I am the messenger’, is now officially my favorite author. No questions. No doubts. He’s just simply amazing! Especially with the second book I mentioned: it ‘s all tied up nicely and just lol-material. I like how he made Ed Kennedy’s character: not an ounce of the super natural or special chosen shit. Just a plain 19 year old cab driver who’s got no future… well, until he gets those cards. Oh yeah… I just love the card idea! I’m actually reading it again. I’ll buy my own copy of the book thief another day… and a german dictionary to go with it.
Hmm… about books, I’ve finished reading my English book for this year. The title : echoes. It’s the thinnest textbook I’ve got! Seriously~ well, exclude the extra chemistry book I bought. The literary pieces in it are, to sum it all up, are those of famous works by great writers (to name a few: Shakespeare, Robert Frost, Edgar Allan Poe… still remember his poem ‘Annabel Lee’ people?). the only think I dislike about the book is it’s text layout. Other than that, content gets an A. but who the hell am I to rate textbooks anyway? Hahahahaha~
I found an old book I used to love when I was still a kid. ‘Shimmeree’ by Stephen Cosgrove. Yes, it’s an odd book for kids that you’d find inside the likes of stores like Book Sale, but it has a nice story to it, though second hand (when my mom bought it). Flip a few more pages and at the end is a short story I actually wrote when I was in kinder. The title : ‘the lovely red rose of the castle’. So fine, I didn’t start writing like a pro, okay? Reading it further (through the blue crayon scrawled all over my chicken scratches) I found myself laughing at typos (or did I just spell destroy as ‘thistroy’?) and grammatical errors everywhere. I’m not going to call it a disgrace though. It’s a memory :D so here I am, re writing it (word per word, wrong grammar per wrong grammar) just for laughs…
…
The lovely red rose of the castle
Once upon a time there was a big red lovely rose beside the castle
One day someone is gowing to thistroy it so the princes heard that her dear lovely plant will be destroy so the next morning she have a glass so that the plant will not be destroy it was a hard glass so she cover the plant so that the plant will not be destroy so the princes live with the plant and they live hapily ever after.
(insert hearts and stars of assorted sizes)
love Elisha
for everyone
…
not bad for a kindergarten kid right? Okay fine, laugh your asses at it but at least I can say I’ve improved a lot! Yeah!
Hmmm… might just effing revise it… hmmm… twist here, twist there… yeah. Definitely changing it but that title will remain :D
(dancing to the beat of groovin’ magic by round table)
well, another night to go then, waiting for something that’ll never come… cheers!
-shing
For example, writing forsaken. A few more days till school starts and I finally found my old manuscripts. Yes, people, I stopped re-writing it cause I LOST the only copy I had. Gomen, kate. I know I didn’t tell you that but I found it now :D I’ll be up and working in a while… and editing it bit by bit too. Can I say once more that my writing sucks? Ahahahaha. I even wonder why I’m writing for a name… I’ve been reading past works again (all unfinished and finished ones) and I try not to laugh at them because I wrote them… the irony they make me feel is unexplainable. *sigh*
Markus Zusak, author of ‘the book thief’ and ‘I am the messenger’, is now officially my favorite author. No questions. No doubts. He’s just simply amazing! Especially with the second book I mentioned: it ‘s all tied up nicely and just lol-material. I like how he made Ed Kennedy’s character: not an ounce of the super natural or special chosen shit. Just a plain 19 year old cab driver who’s got no future… well, until he gets those cards. Oh yeah… I just love the card idea! I’m actually reading it again. I’ll buy my own copy of the book thief another day… and a german dictionary to go with it.
Hmm… about books, I’ve finished reading my English book for this year. The title : echoes. It’s the thinnest textbook I’ve got! Seriously~ well, exclude the extra chemistry book I bought. The literary pieces in it are, to sum it all up, are those of famous works by great writers (to name a few: Shakespeare, Robert Frost, Edgar Allan Poe… still remember his poem ‘Annabel Lee’ people?). the only think I dislike about the book is it’s text layout. Other than that, content gets an A. but who the hell am I to rate textbooks anyway? Hahahahaha~
I found an old book I used to love when I was still a kid. ‘Shimmeree’ by Stephen Cosgrove. Yes, it’s an odd book for kids that you’d find inside the likes of stores like Book Sale, but it has a nice story to it, though second hand (when my mom bought it). Flip a few more pages and at the end is a short story I actually wrote when I was in kinder. The title : ‘the lovely red rose of the castle’. So fine, I didn’t start writing like a pro, okay? Reading it further (through the blue crayon scrawled all over my chicken scratches) I found myself laughing at typos (or did I just spell destroy as ‘thistroy’?) and grammatical errors everywhere. I’m not going to call it a disgrace though. It’s a memory :D so here I am, re writing it (word per word, wrong grammar per wrong grammar) just for laughs…
…
The lovely red rose of the castle
Once upon a time there was a big red lovely rose beside the castle
One day someone is gowing to thistroy it so the princes heard that her dear lovely plant will be destroy so the next morning she have a glass so that the plant will not be destroy it was a hard glass so she cover the plant so that the plant will not be destroy so the princes live with the plant and they live hapily ever after.
(insert hearts and stars of assorted sizes)
love Elisha
for everyone
…
not bad for a kindergarten kid right? Okay fine, laugh your asses at it but at least I can say I’ve improved a lot! Yeah!
Hmmm… might just effing revise it… hmmm… twist here, twist there… yeah. Definitely changing it but that title will remain :D
(dancing to the beat of groovin’ magic by round table)
well, another night to go then, waiting for something that’ll never come… cheers!
-shing
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